Father's Day... Again

Both the joys and challenges of being a father are overwhelming.  I know, because I've been one for 37 years.  Though they change through the years, the joys and challenges of fathering continue for a lifetime.  I have new joys and special blessings now through my grown daughters and the grandsons they have blessed me with, that I could never have anticipated when my girls were little.

Father's Day was especially meaningful for me this year, in part, because of my ten year old grandson, Elijah.  Elijah has grown up living in my home with my daughter, Rebekah.  This was the first Father's Day that Elijah expressed sadness over not having a father.  Elijah's father wanted Rebekah to have an abortion, but I thank God that my daughter chose life.

I have a confession to make, however.  I am thankful now that my daughter chose life, but at the time I was angry.  Not because she decided not to abort her baby.  I was angry because I knew that her pregnancy would impact my life in many ways.  It was a selfish kind of anger, indeed, a sinful anger, and I am ashamed of it now.  I had no idea what a blessing her "choice" would be to me.

Elijah's sadness on Father's Day was a result of his father's decision not to be a part of his life.  His father was present the day he was born, but has only seen Elijah on one occasion since, when Elijah was only 18 months old.  They have had no contact since.  This has left a hole in Elijah's life that no one else can fill, not even me.

Yes, it's true, Elijah has grown up in my home and I've been a part of his life almost every day since day one, but nothing can change the fact that I am his grandfather and not his father.  I sense that time and time again.

Several years ago I was on my way to a pastor's conference and was listening to Focus on the Family on the radio.  The program featured a book about the devastating effects of being fatherless, especially on boys.  Gangs, drugs, alcohol, and crime rates are all dramatically higher for boys without fathers.  As I listened, I was brokenhearted thinking about Elijah.  Then Dr. Dobson asked the author if there was any substitute that could make a real positive impact on the life of a fatherless boy.  The author said that there was only one.  It was to have a resident grandfather, meaning a grandfather who lived in the same home as the boy without a father.  I was so moved by the privilege God had given me to have Elijah in my home and in my life everyday, that I had to pull over to the side of the road because I was crying so hard I couldn't see to drive.

After ten years of being Elijah's resident grandfather, he now seems more like a son than a grandson.  I've had the joy of taking him to school, to soccer, basketball and baseball games, going camping together and on "man dates" to the movies or swimming at the Gulf of Mexico.  We've built Legos together and played catch. We've ridden hundreds of miles on bikes together and shared lots of experiences that fathers and sons get to share.  Each year, he is more and more my "son."  What a blessing it has been to be a "father" again, and this time to experience that joy and challenge with a boy instead of with girls.  Believe me, boys live in a whole different universe than girls!

At the same time I've discovered that it's a special challenge being both "father" and grandfather at the same time.  I find myself constantly changing hats.  Much of the time I have to wear the "father" hat which means setting boundaries, upholding rules, managing and helping with homework, and meting out punishments for infractions, along with his mother, Rebekah.  But sometimes, some wonderful times, I get to put on the "grandfather" hat and just lavish love and spoiling on my grandson like a grandfather is supposed to do.  And sometimes I put on the wrong hat, spoiling when I should discipline, or getting tough when his mother has already handled the situation.

Father's Day meant so much to me this year because I have the privilege of being a "father" again at a stage in life when I have much more wisdom, insight, patience and love in my heart than ever before. I pray that God gives me many more years to be Elijah's surrogate father, so that at an appropriate age for him I can share with him some of the wisdom God has imparted to me through the years on subjects too delicate for a ten year old.

Yes, being a father the first time around was a huge blessing, and it's still a blessing to have my daughters in my life.  But there's a special blessing to being a "father" again.  I know that I can never replace the father Elijah longs for, but what an honor to try and make up for that loss in whatever way I possibly can.  As Father's Day drew to a close yesterday, Elijah and I were celebrating the Spurs victory and putting away the lego tank that we have been building together for the past couple days.  I wished him goodnight and said, "You're like a son to me, Elijah.  I love you."  My heart almost burst as he replied, "You're like a father to me, Papa.  I love you."  I am blessed!

Supernatural Information

Yesterday I spent much of the morning watching a debate between Bill Nye (“The Science Guy”) and Ken Ham (of Answers in Genesis).  Beforehand the debate was billed as being about creation versus evolution.  Sadly, the whole debate ultimately missed the point. 

Most of the debate between these two men related to the age of the earth/universe.  Ken Ham argued repeatedly for a young earth, approximately 6000 years old, while Bill Nye offered many different arguments about why such a young date for the age of the earth was scientifically untenable, and that holding to such a position would hold back science.  Ken Ham argued that the authority of Scripture as the inspired Word of God demands a young earth creationist point of view. 

The fact is that there are many Christians who uphold the authority of Scripture as the inspired Word of God, and who accept the idea that God created the earth/universe, as well as living things according to their "kinds," but who do not believe in a young earth/universe.  John Lennox and Hugh Ross would be two examples.  In his book Seven Days that Divide the World John Lennox argues: “It is Scripture that has the final authority, not our understanding of it.” 

While I believe that it is possible to interpret both Scripture and the scientific data as pointing to a young earth creation, I don’t believe it is absolutely essential to do so.  It is just as possible to interpret both Scripture and the scientific data as pointing to an ancient earth/universe, which was created by God.  There is more than one way to interpret the scientific data that we observe.  There is more than one way to interpret what Scripture has to say about creation and the age of the earth/universe.  Reasonable, Bible-believing Christians can differ and have differed about these issues. 

There is a different issue that Ken Ham touched on in yesterday’s debate that I wish would have consumed the full attention of both debaters.  That is the issue of scientific naturalism, the belief that there is no possibility of the existence of anything supernatural.  While Ken Ham brought this issue up, he allowed himself to be completely sidetracked by Bill Nye’s attacks on the age of the earth.  As a result, this issue was never addressed by Mr. Nye.

I am convinced that it is possible to prove that the supernatural exists, because information is "supernatural," in that it is not material or physical. Those who deny the supernatural, and claim that everything is only material or natural ignore the supernatural aspect of information.  All information (including conscious thought or mind, as well as natural law which is discovered through observation, but which, nevertheless, is not material or physical) exists beyond the physical realm in which we live.  While information can be transmitted by physical or material means, it is not dependent upon those means of transmission for its existence or function.  Many different kinds of physical means can be used to transmit the exact same information.  The human genome can be encoded in DNA, on a CD ROM, or in printed form on paper with ink.  It represents exactly the same information. 

To claim that information, thought, mind, will, or even natural law (such as the laws of physics) must have a "natural" or "material" cause is absurd.  Mind, thought, information and knowledge must originate from a supernatural source, since they are not material or physical, but immaterial and thus, supernatural.  This reality is, I believe, the strongest argument against a purely material or physical universe to be found outside of Scripture.  Those who would argue that the material universe, the “cosmos” is all there is must deny the existence of information, since information is not material. 

We know from everyday experience that information always has its source in the mind of a conscious agent.  Information never arises spontaneously from a purely material or inanimate object.  When God created the universe, He did so to reveal His glory.  His wisdom and power are written not only the physical wonders of the universe such as galaxies and stars, but also in the laws that govern nature and the information that makes life possible.  This supernatural aspect of creation reveals the Supernatural source of all creation, God Himself. 

The Fear of God

I recently read an article stating that active shootings in public settings, where the primary motive appeared to be mass murder and at least one of the victims was unrelated to the suspect, have tripled in the past few years.   This confirmed my impression that there was not just more coverage of such events, but that there actually has been an increase in the number of such crimes taking place.  

This rise in such incidents has led to cries for more gun control, and the enactment of actual gun control measures in certain jurisdictions.  I am convinced, however, that these measures will not bring an end to such evil outbreaks.  

What is it that motivates someone to commit mass murder? In some cases mental illness may be involved.  But Scripture tells us that there is a more basic problem that causes such crimes to erupt.  Psalm 36:1 says, "concerning the sinfulness of the wicked; There is no fear of God before his eyes." 

The trend has been documented towards more and more unbelief in our culture.  The percentage of people answering "none" to the question of religious preference is on the rise.  And while most unbelievers are fine, upstanding citizens, there is an evil that lurks within everyone of us which must be contained.  It is the fear of God that helps us do this.  Proverbs 16:6 says, "through the fear of the LORD a man avoids evil."  Fearing God is the very definition of wisdom and righteousness.  "To fear the LORD is to hate evil" (Proverbs 8:13).

What is the fear of God?  It consists of three things, awe, dread, and trust.  God has given us the wonders of creation to enable us to stand in awe of His almighty power.  He has given us His law to reveal His righteousness and justice and to make us dread His wrath and punishment.  He has given us the Gospel, the Good News of salvation through Christ's life, death and resurrection to enable us to trust in Him. When these three work together to instill the fear of God in our hearts, we have His power at work to reign in sin and overcome evil.  

Without the fear of God, a person bent on perpetrating violence on others has nothing to restrain him.  He views death as a better end than a lifetime of incarceration, and will not stop the murder until he is stopped, or despairing any hope of redemption, takes his own life.  We need the fear of God!

Trying to eliminate such crimes through gun control will be no more effective than trying to eliminate poverty through welfare.  Just as Jesus told us, "The poor you will always have with you," there will always be wicked men who do not fear God and whose hearts are set on violence. 

In Everything Give Thanks!

Thanksgiving is the traditional time to count our blessings and give thanks to God for His goodness to us.  This year as Thanksgiving approaches I've begun to wonder if giving thanks will come as easily and naturally as it has in the past.  The sinful part of me (that still clings even after I have been made a new creation in Christ) would like to focus on the negative aspects of the "new normal" that my wife, Diana, and I are learning to live with since she has been diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer.  A part of me wants to scream, "Not fair!"  But the new me is listening over and over again to Paul's words in 1 Thessalonian 5:18: "Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus."

Therefore, in good Thanksgiving tradition I've made a list of ten things for which I am thankful this year (one for each finger of each hand like the little hand turkeys my girls would make in school when they were little).

1) I am thankful for Diana, who has stood by my side to love, support and encourage me for 42 years of good times and difficult times. I am thankful that she has supported me even when I did not deserve her support.

2) I am thankful for Diana's faith, which has allowed her to receive this diagnosis humbly and trustingly, and to give a strong witness to others in the face of her illness.  She truly is a grace-filled woman of God.

3) I am thankful for Diana's sweet and caring nature that is always more concerned for others than for herself.  I have already seen her reach out in kindness and love to doctors and nurses, other patients and caregivers, to friends and family, when she could easily be wrapped up in her own concerns.

4) I am thankful for state of the art medical care and facilities that are close to home, comfortable and available because we have good health insurance.  Even a little blessing like comfortable waiting rooms and treatment rooms make the doctor visits, treatments and procedures more bearable.

5) I am thankful for doctors, nurses, aids, lab technicians, office people and schedulers who have been kind, helpful and caring, in trying their very best to make difficult circumstances just a little more bearable.

6) I am thankful for science and scientific advancements that have allowed doctors to identify the EGFR mutation in Diana's cancer, which means that it may be possible to use a targeted oral cancer treatment to maintain Diana's health once the first course of chemo-therapy is over.

7) I am thankful to have family nearby to love, support and encourage us in these times of trial, a daughter and grandson at home, and another daughter, son-in-law and grandson close enough to visit without spending a fortune on plane fare.

8) I am thankful for a part-time ministry position that provides some needed extra income in view of medical expenses, yet is not as demanding as being the Senior Pastor.  My ministry allows me to share my faith in the midst of these trials in ways that may help others. My ministry here, and through the years in other places, has connected us with hundreds of brothers and sisters in Christ who are praying, encouraging and loving us through these trials.  What a blessing!

9) Most of all, I am thankful for my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, who took our sins and bore our sorrows so that even in the face of death we have an everlasting hope, and the certainty of a joyful reunion with Him and with my dear wife, even after her life here has ended. 

10) Dare I add one more?  Dare I even think it, let alone say it?  I am thankful for Diana's cancer, because it has brought us closer to each other and closer to our
Lord than we have ever been before.  It is teaching us patience and perseverance.  It is building our character and increasing our hope.  I guess that is the definition of "give thanks in all circumstances."

The WHOLE Will of God

A number of years ago I was interviewing a prospective assistant pastor and asked him about his goals in life.  He told me that he had just one goal... to be holy.  His answer blew me away!  We did not end up calling this man to the church I was serving, and I was very happy that we hadn't when I learned sometime later that he had left the ministry when he left his wife and family for another woman.

Ever since I heard his answer I began questioning myself about my own goals.  What was my heart's desire?  What did I truly long for?  What was my aim in life?  And more importantly, what was God's will for me and for my life?  I must confess that sometimes I've told people that my only goal in life was to be holy, but then I would recall that pastor's fall and wonder how anyone could ever claim such a lofty goal.  

And yet, isn't that what God's Word tells us?  Peter wrote: "Just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do" (1 Peter 1:15).  Shouldn't God's will be my will?  Doesn't His Word promise us: "Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart" (Psalm 37:4)?  Truly, when we are delighted in Him, then our heart's desire will be what He desires for us. Didn't St. Paul write: "Aim for perfection" (2 Corinthians 13:11)?

But the failure of my brother kept nagging me.  My own sins kept haunting me.  They kept me from setting my sights too high.  Then, a few days ago I was out on my bike, thinking, praying, and listening to some Christian music (as I usually do when I ride), and I finally came to the full realization of exactly what God expects of me, what His will for my life is, and where He wants me to be in my relationship with Him.

God's will for my life is that I love Him with my whole heart, mind, soul, and strength, that my desire is for Him and Him alone, and that my heart's longing is to honor and please Him in everything that I think and do and say.  Nothing less than this could possibly match the will of our holy God.  But that is only half of God's will for my life. 

The other half of God's will is that I recognize my complete and utter incapacity to do that which I have just expressed, because of my sinful nature.  God's will is that I recognize my complete and utter dependence on the grace of God in Jesus Christ, so that by daily repentance and faith I am made righteous in His sight and receive the free gift of eternal life through the atoning blood of Jesus, who received the payment for my sin in His death on the cross, and won the victory for me by His glorious resurrection.

If I only understand the first half of God's will for my life I will be crushed by the weight of my failure.  If I only understand the second half of God's will for my life I will fail to strive with every fiber of my being to serve and glorify Him in every way.  

To love Him and long for holiness, while trusting Him for the grace that alone can save, that is indeed a good place to be.  It is, I am convinced, to be in the center of God's will.

Some Thoughts from a Grateful Grandfather

Next Sunday, September 8, is national Grandparents Day.  I was getting ready to do a Grandparent's Day chapel for our Christian Day School and I believe God gave me some special thoughts that I want to share.  Let me address some thoughts to children, to parents and to grandparents.

First let's look at grandparents from the kids’ point of view.  Why are grandparents so special?  Kids sometimes seem to appreciate grandma and grandpa more than they do mom and dad.  Why is that?  Well, mom and dad have a job to do.  Their job is to bring you up in the fear and admonition of the Lord. That means they have to teach you right from wrong.  They have to discipline and correct you when you disobey. That’s a tough job, so sometimes they have to be tough with you.  But they’re working hard at it and doing their best.   They're seeking to show you God’s holiness and righteousness, His good and perfect will for your life. So, kids, be thankful for mom and dad too!

For Grandma and grandpa, however, that job’s mostly done (at least much of the time it is).  They did that job for your mom and dad.  That’s why you have such great parents today!  It’s because of your grandma and grandpa.  But now, grandma and grandpa have a different role in your life.

Their role now is to show you another side of God, not His holiness or righteousness, but His love and joy. Did you know that God delights in you?  I think of the passage in Zephaniah.  “The Lord your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing.” (Zephaniah 3:17)  Or perhaps a verse like this: “For the Lord takes delight in his people; he crowns the humble with salvation. Let the saints rejoice in this honor and sing for joy on their beds.” (Psalm 149:4-5)  Did you ever sing for joy on your bed after spending a wonderful day with grandma and grandpa?  That’s a gift from God through your grandparents.

Through the prophet Jeremiah God says, “I will enjoy doing good to them.” (Jeremiah 32:41)  That’s the way grandma and grandpa are.  They enjoy doing good to you.  That’s their job.  Their job is to be a living illustration of God’s delight in loving you and doing good things for you.  So when grandma dances with you and grandpa plays games with you, they are helping you feel how much God loves you.  They don’t have to be tough with you (unless maybe you have a complete meltdown). 

How many of you have had grandma or grandpa dance over you with joy or sing happy songs with you?  When they do that, they’re doing the job God gave them to do, that is, to show you His love.  You know how it is.  Grandma and grandpa say yes to treats, while mom and dad make you eat your veggies.  Grandma and grandpa play games while mom and dad have other important work to do.  That’s what makes grandparents so great!

Now let’s consider grandparents from the parents’ point of view.   Why do you parent’s appreciate your kids’ grandparents so much?  Hey, free babysitting, right?  But seriously, when your own parents finally become your kids’ grandparents, you appreciate them so much more because you finally get it.  Until you become a parent yourself, you can’t possibly appreciate everything your parents did for you.   But once you become a parent you finally begin to understand all the things your parents did for you.  You begin to comprehend the sacrifices they made and the effort they put forth.  You finally begin to appreciate how hard it is to be a good parent, and that makes you value grandma and grandpa a whole lot more than you ever did before. 

Finally let’s consider grandkids from grandma and grandpa’s point of view.  Why are grandkids so much better than kids?  Well, first of all, they’re payback to your kids, right? But seriously, why are grandchildren such a great blessing to grandparents?  I believe part of it has to do with where we are in life as grandparents.  We’re at a stage where we have a lot more wisdom garnered from our life experience, and a lot more perspective about life’s ups and downs, so I think we’re in a better position to appreciate and enjoy our grandchildren more than we ever did our own children. 

But why do we love being with our grandkids so much?  I think, at least in part, it’s because we don’t have to be tough with them, at least not most of the time.  That’s not our job.  That’s mom and dad’s job.  As I said before, we get to show them the other side of God’s character, His loving side.  We get to demonstrate His unconditional love for them, and we get to show them that God takes great joy in them, that He delights in doing good to them. 

But even more than that, I think the reason grandparents love grandchildren so much is that they give us a special gift from God.  They give us a chance to be kids again.  We get to laugh and play and sing and dance and eat ice cream and do all kinds of things that we didn’t have as much opportunity to do when the full responsibility of parenting our own kids weighed heavily on our shoulders.  Is there a more joyful or carefree time in life than childhood?  I don’t think so.  But when we’re spending time with our grandchildren we get to celebrate the joy of childhood all over again.  We can forget about our aches and pains and the infirmities of aging for just a few minutes and be fun and carefree all over again.  It’s like having a second childhood.  That’s a gift from God through our grandchildren. 

That’s why grandparents are so special and why being a grandparent is so special.  We need to say a special thankyou to God for grandparents and grandchildren.  We need to say a special thank you to our grandparents for the love they show us from our Heavenly Father.   And we need to thank our grandchildren for the special joy they bring to us.  I believe grandparents and grandchildren are extraordinary gifts of God's grace!

Grace through the Flood

Almost 70 years after Enoch was taken from the earth to the LORD, a great grandson named Noah was born.  We may reasonably conclude that the stories of his great grandfather’s righteousness and faith had a strong spiritual impact on Noah because Scripture tells us, “Noah was a righteous man, blameless among the people of his time, and he walked with God” (Genesis 6:9). Clearly, the character of Enoch inhabited his great grandson, and like his great grandfather he delighted in the company of the LORD.  As He did for Abraham generations later, God took Noah into His confidence and shared His plans with Noah.  “I am going to put an end to all people, for the earth is filled with violence because of them” (Genesis 6:13).  God told Noah to build a huge vessel in which He would preserve the life of Noah and his family, along with two of every kind of animal through an earth-shattering flood.  His faith was evident in that “Noah did everything just as God commanded him” (Genesis 6:22).  When Noah’s work was complete God told him, “Go into the ark, you and your whole family, because I have found you righteous in this generation” (Genesis 7:1).  How is it that Noah was “found righteous” before the LORD?  Just like Enoch, Noah too was a sinner.  And just like Enoch before him and Abraham after him, Noah was accounted righteous before the LORD by grace through faith.  “By faith Noah, when warned about things not yet seen, in holy fear built an ark to save his family. By his faith he condemned the world and became heir of the righteousness that comes by faith” (Hebrews 11:7).

God was gracious to Noah and preserved his life through the flood.  When the rain had ended and the waters receded, God told Noah and his family to leave the ark, along with all the animals.  Just as He had previously blessed Adam and Eve, so now God renewed His blessing to Noah and his family.  “Then God blessed Noah and his sons, saying to them, ‘Be fruitful and increase in number and fill the earth’” (Genesis 9:1). God’s grace would cause Noah and his family to repopulate the earth.  God also granted Noah a new source of food that had not been given to Adam and Eve: “Everything that lives and moves will be food for you. Just as I gave you the green plants, I now give you everything” (Genesis 9:3).  However, in a world where animals could now be killed for food, God carefully defined the doctrine of human exceptionalism.  “And for your lifeblood I will surely demand an accounting. I will demand an accounting from every animal. And from each man, too, I will demand an accounting for the life of his fellow man. ‘Whoever sheds the blood of man, by man shall his blood be shed; for in the image of God has God made man’” (Genesis 9:5-6).  By this gracious proclamation, God would restrain some of the violence that led Him to destroy the pre-flood world.  This decree was based upon the grace that God poured out on us at the time of creation when He made us in His image.  It is the image of God that makes our lives worth preserving and protecting from conception in the womb to natural death.  It is the image of God that gives us unspeakable dignity and inestimable worth. It is the image of God that makes us worth redeeming, even at the price of God’s own Son.  Thus, God’s grace in creation was renewed after the flood, to protect the life of every human being, so that living and believing in Him we might be redeemed by His grace.

The grace of God would be revealed in an enduring way through the covenant that God made with Noah and his family after the flood.  “And God said, ‘This is the sign of the covenant I am making between me and you and every living creature with you, a covenant for all generations to come: I have set my rainbow in the clouds, and it will be the sign of the covenant between me and the earth.  Whenever I bring clouds over the earth and the rainbow appears in the clouds, I will remember my covenant between me and you and all living creatures of every kind. Never again will the waters become a flood to destroy all life” (Genesis 912-15).  Although the wickedness of mankind would increase and multiply with the repopulation of the earth, God promised to be gracious and never again destroy all people with a flood.  Every rainbow in the sky, then, is a sign, first to God to remind Him of His gracious promise to us, but the rainbow is also to us, to remind us that God keeps His promises.  He is faithful, and because of His grace we know that we will be spared the fate of Noah’s generation.  Just as God made gracious provision for Noah and his family to be saved, so He has also made provision for our salvation.  “God waited patiently in the days of Noah while the ark was being built. In it only a few people, eight in all, were saved through water, and this water symbolizes baptism that now saves you also” (1 Peter 3:20-21).  Just as God saved Noah and his family through the waters of the flood, so He has graciously saved us through the water of Holy Baptism.  In this life saving flood our sins were washed away.  Every application of water to our bodies, therefore, should be as rich a reminder of the grace of God as is every rainbow in the sky.  

Copyright by the Author.