Anniversary Getaways

Throughout our 43 years of marriage I served in the pastoral ministry and Diana either taught Lutheran School or was a stay at home mom and homemaker.  As a result, we had little money in the budget for elaborate vacations.  Most of the time our only vacation was traveling back to Michigan to visit family, and most often it took the form of a road trip, which even when made from Minneapolis was completed in one day's drive of over 14 hours in order to save a motel bill.  Vacations got a little nicer when we lived in Seattle, but for the most part our only real splurge each year would come in the form of a short getaway for our anniversary.  It was usually two nights, but sometimes we'd go over the top and do three nights. When the kids were school aged or younger they would be entrusted to the care of loving congregation members.  These getaways became some of the highlights of our life together, and they were always remembered fondly by both Diana and I.

Naturally, when our 44th wedding anniversary came around just six weeks after Diana went home to heaven, a getaway "for the two of us" seemed only natural.  I remembered the first time we visited San Antonio before moving here in 2009, and decided that it would be nice to stay on the Riverwalk, as we had back then, and have dinner at the same restaurant that we enjoyed on that trip, the Little Rhine Steakhouse.  So I am writing this blog from my hotel room on the Riverwalk, fully realizing that this getaway will be nothing like the dozens of others we enjoyed throughout our marriage, but still hoping that it will be a positive and helpful part of my grieving process.  

On our getaways before Diana passed we would always enjoy special meals together, share some romantic times and get some well needed rest.  In addition, however we would use our time to look back over the past year and evaluate what was working in our marriage and what needed work.  We would take time to reminisce about the past year, reading some of Diana's journals and looking through photo albums.  We would talk about our hopes and dreams for the future and our plans for the year ahead.  As I think more about them, I realize now how important these annual getaways were to the success of our marriage.  They became mileposts along the path of life that helped us stay on course and keep moving forward.  

Bed and Breakfast Getaway
in Leavenworth, Washington

One of our very first getaways was to a place called Jumer's Castle Lodge in the Illinois/Iowa Quad Cities.  One of the best ever was to Roche Harbor Resort on San Juan Island in Puget Sound.  Our 25th Anniversary getaway was to Lutsen Ski Resort (we could afford the rates in the summer) in Minnesota.  Each holds special joys as I think about how it impacted our marriage and our relationship.  And yes, there may have been one or two disasters along the way because of bad lodging or an argument that cropped up, but I think I've managed to forget about those.

Tonight I've brought Diana's external hard drive loaded with pictures from the past 15 years.  It was too much to try and bring the other 30 years worth of photo albums.  I also brought her latest journals.  She always shared them with me and would often specifically ask me to read something in particular that she had written, so I'm not violating any confidence.  I plan to use the time alone to reminisce, to thank God for all of His blessings on us throughout our marriage, and to particularly thank God for all the ways He blessed me through Diana.  I am already holding back tears as I think about our past getaways, and I know the flood gates will burst sometime during this time alone, as I spend my first "anniversary getaway" on my own.

If you happen to be on the beginning stages of your marriage journey, I urge you to consider making an anniversary getaway a part of your tradition.  I know that Diana and I were truly blessed by it.